163. What We Wish We Have Known Before Having Kids

By cpaine | March 29, 2022

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If we could go back and tell our 23-year-old and 24-year-old selves something when we had our first child, what would we say? In this episode, we share some candid thoughts on What We Wish We Had Known Before Having Kids.

We discuss how I went into parenting thinking I could control our kids and I’ve had to learn the hard way that I can’t control the outcome or choices of our kids — especially as they are getting older. We also share about how we wish we had known that loving our kids was so much more important (and effective!) than lecturing them.

And we close by sharing how we wish we had focused more on building a relationship with our kids from the very beginning and how we had no idea how FUN it would be to have teenagers (contrary to what we thought).

I give an update on what is saving my life, and it just happens to be a special moment with one of the kids. I also give an update on the book  I am currently listening to. Jesse and I discuss how different it must be to live in certain situations and how to function during difficult times.

In This Episode

[00:34] – Welcome to another episode of The Crystal Paine Show.

[01:10] – I share something special that has been so meaningful to me recently.

[03:48] – I am also listening to a really fantastic book right now.

[05:47] – It is a quiet unfolding of the story that is really important.

[08:53] – Jesse reads the temporary rules in 1941 for the Richmond Golf Club in London England.

[11:12] – Sometimes the best thing is, instead of living in fear, put your head down and do the next best thing.

[11:55] – What we wish we knew, before having kids; this was a request that came in from someone and she asked if we would talk about it.

[13:00] – The biggest thing for me, I wish that I knew ahead of time that I couldn’t control them.

[14:58] – As parents we would take the responsibility of those bad decisions, when that is not our responsibility to bear as well.

[16:04] – I think there’s a fine line balance between recognizing our responsibility but also God’s sovereignty.

[16:30] – Loving them is more important than lecturing them.

[18:06] – The relationship is so much more important than the end result.

[20:55] – I wish I had known how much fun they would be and to just enjoy them.

[22:18] – Choose your perspective and choose your mindset.

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