348: Reimagining Church as Family with J.J. Jones

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What does it really mean for the church to be a family? In this episode of The Crystal Paine Show, I am joined by my friend Dr. J.J. Jones, co-author of Reimagining Church as Family, for a conversation that even challenged me to think differently about who feels seen, welcomed, and truly included in our churches!

Listen in as J.J. shares how years of research and ministry experience led him and his co-author Rich Griffith to rethink some of the traditional approaches to family ministry. Too often, as he discusses, our programs, language, and even the ways in which we structure church life assume a traditional nuclear family, and that can unintentionally leave single parents, divorced parents, single adults, foster and adoptive families, families raising children with disabilities, and others feeling like they don’t quite belong.

The two of us talk about what it looks like to move beyond simply supporting someone during a crisis and actually walking with them for the long haul. We discuss the importance of examining the words that we use, listening to people’s stories, and asking what the church can do differently so that people don’t feel like outsiders in God’s family..

We also get practical about what church members and leaders can do to enact change such as creating more intergenerational spaces, inviting someone to sit with you, sharing a meal, making accommodations, mentoring younger believers, and simply being willing to have the sometimes-awkward conversations that lead to real connection!

Maybe most importantly, we talk about following Jesus toward the people who may feel overlooked or pushed to the margins, and I truly hope this conversation encourages you to look around your own church community with fresh eyes and ask: Who might be here but still feel alone, and what could I do to change that? Enjoy my conversation with Dr. J.J. Jones, and, as always, please feel free to reach out with your thoughts!

In This Episode
[0:36] – I introduce my friend Dr. J.J. Jones and explore the inspiration behind his book Reimagining Church as Family.
[1:15] – J.J. explains how research exposed gaps in traditional family ministry and inspired a more inclusive approach for him.
[4:24] – Hear me highlight the church’s responsibility to support nontraditional families.
[6:41] – J.J/ reveals how churches often initially support nontraditional families but then fail to follow up.
[7:55] – J.J. challenges churches to embrace nontraditional families and help everyone experience belonging within God’s family.
[10:05] – I highlight how harmful labels such as “broken home” can undermine hope, dignity, and belonging..
[13:04] – J.J. encourages churches to listen directly to diverse families and rethink how their messages could unintentionally exclude them.
[15:55] – Intergenerational groups can help create a sense of belonging by bringing believers of different ages and experiences together.
[18:30\ – J.J. recommends intergenerational groups and shared worship as some practical steps toward becoming a more inclusive church family.
[20:11] – J.J. explains how apprenticeships and shared worship can connect generations while helping overlooked families experience real belonging.
[23:16] – J.J. urges churches to empower single parents and other families to lead worship and contribute gifts.
[25:21] – Listen as J.J. explains how simple invitations and listening can help newcomers and single parents feel welcomed into a church community.
[28:34] – J.J. highlights specialized communities which support isolated special-needs families while also meeting their unique needs.
[30:47] – I encourage listeners to embrace awkwardness, extend kindness, and take first steps toward connection.
[32:16] – J.J. calls upon churches to build relationships and support families through difficult, ongoing journeys.
[34:59] – I reflect upon how curiosity, prayer, and compassion changed my judgment into love and understanding.
[37:12] – J.J. points to Jesus’ example of extending grace to marginalized people and welcoming them as family.

Links & Resources
Crystal Paine

Books
Reimaging Church as Family by Various Authors
The Ancient Church as Family by Joseph H. Hellerman
When the Church Was a Family: Recapturing Jesus’ Vision for Authentic Christian Community  by Joseph H. Hellerman

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